Everyday Upstander

Bystander

Noun

A person who sees or knows a bullying incident is occurring to someone else. 

Upstander

Noun

A person who uses words and actions that can help someone who is being bullied.

There are a range of helpful actions you can take if you feel safe enough to do so.

1. Āwhinatia / Support the person experiencing bullying

• Awhi the person being bullied, even if you just stand beside them and let them know you’ve got their back.

• Encourage them to ask a kaiako/teacher for help or go with them to get help.

• Give them our Getting Help and Advice page.

• Let them know they’re not alone!

2. Haukotia / Distract

Interrupt the bullying in some way:

• Ask the person experiencing bullying if they want to go for a walk or do something else.

• Help them to leave the situation they’re in.

3. Karangahia / Call it!

• If you feel safe to, let the person/people doing the bullying know what they’re doing isn’t okay.

• Use your words to show aroha and kindness to those involved.

• Don’t stand by and watch. It can be hard to speak up in the moment but it can make a huge difference.

4. Taihoa ake, ka haumaru / Leave and act

If you don’t feel safe to step in while the bullying is happening:

• Move away from the situation.

• Later, let the person experiencing the bullying know you saw and ask what might help.

• You might want to have a quiet word with the person doing the bullying.
  

5. Tautokohia / Get some other help

• Support the person being bullied to get help from others – whānau, kaiako, a trusted adult or a helpline and then act on their advice.